Bad Wiring

Hello again.

So I'm sitting here, typing this out on my Apple MacBook that I've had for several years now and am now officially in love with again. My MacBook was suffering for quite a long time with a horrible case of narcolepsy. It was suffering, I, on the other hand, was livid. Completely random failures are infuriating to begin with, but this thing threw in a serious case of "bad timing" with it.

I'd hit "enter" after typing in my password on my bank website, sleep.  I'm 5 GB into a 5.5 GB file transfer to my network drive, sleep. Sometimes it would go weeks without a hiccup, other times it would be in such a hurry to go back to sleep it wouldn't even finish waking all the way up from me pounding on the keyboard.

There were more than a few times this thing almost wound up being a silicon slick in the middle of the highway.

I suppose I could have taken it in to Apple and had them fix it for about half the cost it would take to buy a new one, but I don't have that kind of money, so I lived with it.

I did some digging though and found what I was 99.9% sure was the problem. A faulty sensor, the one that can tell when you close the lid. I scraped up my pennies and eventually ordered the part from iFixIt.com. I got the part sooner than expected and within 1 hour my MacBook was cured.

Now, if only my brain worked like that. (How's THAT for a segue?)

I've realized just how hard-wired I am when it comes to certain things, and just how crossed some of those wires are. This entry, for example. Every time I type out "Hello" (including that one) I stick a W on the end. Hellow. Why? What is that all about? The first one I can understand, but I knew what I was going to say in this paragraph, and I did it anyway? In my head I guess "Hello" is spelled H-E-L-L-O-W-Backspace.

Another quirk is how I will be watching something on TV and talk back to the voiceover guy.  Let's say I'm watching some medical show and the announcer says something like "He suffered a severe compound fracture of his right leg." to which I will reply "As opposed to a mild compound fracture." Or a show like Cops: "He was found to be illegally in possession of stolen merchandise" as opposed to being legally in possession of stolen merchandise. And so on. Again, it's automatic. Even if I don't say it  I'm thinking it.

 I retain lots of stupid crap too. I can't remember my mom's birthday, but I can sure remember a line from Monty Python or some obscure thing someone said to me once. Here's a lovely example that is just perfect for the holidays:

Many years ago, an old girlfriend of mine used the term "missile tits" to describe the unusually perky parts of another woman's anatomy. I never heard that term before, or I think since, used by anyone. I DON'T EVEN USE IT. I don't even think about using it... until...  I was at the store and they were playing Christmas music on the overhead. The song in particular was "I'll Be Home For Christmas" -

some of you have already figured out where I'm going with this... congratulations, you're on my level.

I'm happily strolling through the store, pushing my cart and quietly singing along...

"please have snow... and missile tits" Wait, WHAT? It was automatic. I was glad I was singing quietly to myself. Why would my brain sabotage one of my favorite holiday songs like that? It doesn't even rhyme. Now every time I hear that song, that's the line I have in my head. Its stuck like glue.

Oh there are more, but I really don't want to make myself look like any more of a whack-job. I think I have a bad sensor too and I doubt iFixIt has any of those in stock. I guess I'll just live with it.